The Teshuva of Elul is not a slogan,
it's Our Truest Heart and Soul
By Rabbi Shimon Raichik
Over the past few articles we have been speaking about the importance of accepting Hashem’s sovereignty and taking personal responsibility (kabolas ol), in fulfilling all aspects of Torah and mitzvos and avodas Hashem. This week we continue on that theme, delving into the heart and soul of what truly motivates us. If our acceptance is out of fear or because we don't want to rebel, then our acceptance may be productive and good but it is still superficial. If however our motivation stems from a recognition of being a part of Hashem, as the pasuk says, “Chelek Hashem Amo, His nation is a part of Him (Hashem) then our commitment is rooted deep in the essence of our soul (see chapter 2 in Tanya). When we recognize that we are truly connected deep down, and we feel that we are a part Hashem then we truly desire to except his sovereignty with complete personal responsibility.
The coming month of Elul is a month of teshuva. The Alter Rebbe defines defines teshuva in Igeres HaTeshuva. First, teshuva means letting go of sin. Secondly it's the acceptance of Hashem’s kingship and the commitment not to rebel in the future. If this acceptance is only superficial then it is likely that the commitment will not last. With the entire world with all it’s attractions directly in front of us and only a superficial commitment to respond to it’s constant barrage of temptations our ability to withstand will be tested immensely. If however our commitment is strong and deep, although it's a great test, we not only have the ability to withstand but to thrive and influence others as well.
There are two things here. The acceptance of Hashem’s kingship and the inner desire of acceptance and the subjugation of our personal will for Hashem. When we truly realize that Hashem is our master, we know we belong to Hashem. It's not sufficient to just accept responsibility to some degree along with the temptations. We must go further, to break the independent "I ", the ego and bend our life in favor of our Master’s will. It is only then that we become what we were meant to be and assume our truest self. Therefore our acceptance of Hashem and take taking personal responsibility is not just a dry mechanical and superficial process, it comes with a deep honest and heartfelt connection.
The aforementioned is also true in the relationship between a Rebbe and a Chosid. Some people have a sense for how great the Rebbe is, and truly appreciate all of the Rebbe does and all that the Rebbe stands for. The question is how much does our acceptance of the Rebbe impact our personal behavior. When it comes to accomplishing what the Rebbe wants do we place our personal desires and opinions on the side or do we defer? When the moment comes to act or not to do what is wrong do we have the strength because; that's what a Chosid does or not to do what a Chosid doesn’t do?. Do I act, bend and change my life because of my connection to the Rebbe?
It is well-known that the Rebbe many times would emphasize and sing and motion with great enthusiasm the words, “Ana avdah d’Kudsha Brich Hu, I am a servant of Hashem” when the Sefer Torah was being brought out of Aron for Krias HaTorah. All could see how the Rebbe was so aroused and enthusiastic about these words. These words are so special because they are a recognition of what we have and what we are. We have a Master that we are connected to and we have the honor to be His servants. Especially moving was the Rebbe’s boundless enthusiasm on Simchas Torah (you can see it on the video of Hoshana Rabba for 5738-1977) when in his ceaseless fervor his Tallis kept falling off.
So serving Hashem, accepting His sovereignty and taking personal responsibility are not dry, mechanical and lifeless motions, they are our heart and soul, they our essence. This is the message of Elul. The acronym for Elul begins with, I am yours, Ani Dodi. All of the activities of Torah, mitzvos and avodah are important and essential. But it's not just the act; it's also our internal recognition and our inner desire, will and connection that guarantees our future and the perpetuation of our service, which culminates with the coming of Moshiach. May we experience the appearance of Moshiach still in this year 5776 Shnas Hakel!
A good Shabbos, A good Chodesh