Gaining Strength from the Temptations we Resist
By Rabbi Shimon Raichik
The Baal Shem Tov teaches that everything one hears and sees is a lesson in the service of Hashem. The latest news has been filled with stories of firings and resignations regarding improper and immodest conduct between men and woman.
This is an obvious lesson about the importance and value of the laws of modesty and yichud as they are in the Torah. Every one of us, without exception, has an animal soul which wants its pleasures. That is the created nature of the animal soul for which there is no escape. Therefore, the proper management of the feelings and inclinations between men and women is one of the most challenging to master. Specifically, because of this the Torah has very clear instructions. Clarity about this very basic fact, that it is the most challenging issue of human behavior lies at the axiomatic bedrock of the Torah’s guidelines. The Torah is very specific and enacts laws that are preventive in nature such as yichud. By following the Torah’s prescription for modesty and yichud, it’s as if one gets a partial inoculation as it were from the more detrimental effects that improper circumstance would cause. When we keep known attractions at an arm’s distance at the outset then we never even arrive at those difficulties. We take these laws to heart because we do not fool ourselves and underestimate our vulnerabilities.
The Torah reading on the afternoon of Yom Kippur concerns forbidden relationships. The question has been raised; What kind of a place is this subject at such a holy time, on the afternoon of Yom Kippur? The answer to this question is that this indeed this is an inescapable reality, the fact of our base animal nature. It goes with us wherever we go, even right through the middle of the holiest of times, even on the afternoon of Yom Kippur. As such we need to be aware and guard ourselves to maintain the sanctity that we achieve as we strive in the service of Hashem.
Sometimes those that take the laws of modesty and yichud seriously are looked upon as old fashioned, out of touch and square. When presented with an expression of modesty some may roll their eyes or make a gesture to imply that the act of modesty is over-the-top. The truth however is that we need, now more than ever, to strengthen ourselves, to get a shot in the arm, when it comes to the matters manners and modes of modesty. Whether it's bachurim that go on mivtzoyim or merkaz shlichus or married men in their business lives or with their secretaries. Whether it’s couples going on a vacation or just getting together for Shabbos; or young people going out on shidduch dates or after they are engaged. It could be counselors at camp and how best to interact between the boys and girls or maybe it's in our yeshivas schools and seminaries with regard to the proper decorum between teachers and students. Whatever or wherever it might be, we all need to become educated in depth to clarify the proper Torah manners and modes of modesty and yichud in all areas between men and women in both spirit and halacha.
The time has come to be very outspoken and unambiguous in order to make these issues clear and straight. When we have resolve and act without embarrassment we have the strength not to stumble falter or fall down. This is the lesson that we learn from today’s current events.
Yaakov Avinu prepared himself before he went down to Charan by studying the Torah in the yeshiva of Shem and Eiver and by davening at Har HaMoriah. He continued davening throughout his stay in Charan even through the cold nights in order to stay strong and connected. He didn't do these things only to avoid falling down but most importantly to elevate his surroundings. He was successful in the end and returned to Eretz Yisroel with his family and his Judaism intact as well as with great wealth physically and spiritually. We can learn from Yaakov Avinu to first strengthen ourselves not to fall down in the face of temptation and most importantly to have the strength to elevate everything in the world around us and bring them up to Eretz Yisroel with the coming of Moshiach now.
A Good Shabbos